I can be free. Free to pursue what God wants. Jesus only did what he saw his Father doing. No more, no less.
I can be free from being tyrannized by what I want. I can be obedient to what God wants. He is in charge of His country. I need to obey.
Jesus went through everything you're going through and more, learn to think like him. Think of your sufferings as a weaning from that old habit of always expecting to get your own way which misses God's goal. Then you'll be able to live out your days free to pursue what God wants instead of being tyrannized by what you want. 1 Peter 4
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